Jealousy

Curious about my title? Well, are you thinking that I'm jealous because of some sort of girls approaching my man or what-so-ever? Haha.. Hell no!!

To be exact, I'm a bit regretted that I didn't pursue my studies. 'Causing that I have no chance to study abroad with my coursemates. That's so so so sad! I'm so so so so jealous of them getting the chance to go overseas. Even if I could afford to go for vacations to western countries in future, still I would never ever have a chance to experience the study lifestyle with a bunch of friends in different country, different lifestyle, different cultures and stuffs.

Of course, No Pain, No Gain. Well, I heard my friend saying that if you're applied for KOJADI loan, let's say you loan for 35k, the amount you have to pay back after you complete your studies in UK is RM500 per month. Some will think RM500 per month is okay right if you only need to pay for 4-5 years, just like paying car instalments. But what if it's for 10 years? When I heard 10 years, I get really really shocked. Okay fine.

Although the interest is really high but no doubt that it's a great experience to explore different stuffs. Everytime when I look at their recent uploaded photos in UK, I really really really hope that I could be with them together. Hmmm, okay, no looking back. Only thing I can do is to earn more money and make my dreams come true. Lotsa countries that I wish to go, haha...

And, yea, cracking my head on my resume. How to describe my current jobscope? Ish.. I hate to update my resume. Job hunting is time to start again. Sien about it lorr.. Don't know what kind of company I will be in? Don't know how's the environment? Don't know how's the colleagues around? Don't know if I can cope with it? A lot of questions in my mind but I have no decision or ideas yet which get me really panic. What if no one want to hire me? What if I can do the job well? Oh shit, lost control, lost control, don't think so much.

I know I can handle it. Sometimes just thinking too much. Just need my friends to support me. Talking about friends, referring to my high school classmates, I feel bad about myself. I'm the one with lower qualifications among all. At least all of them get a degree cert. I'm not saying that they make comparisons, just feel that I'm not-so-comfortable sometimes when we discuss about job opportunities or something related although they really feel nothing about it. Sorry about that, I just feel bad towards myself. However, at least I have my loved one with me is more than everything. =)